Vietnamese girls in US

Discussion in 'Vietnamese Chat' started by lil_zumster, Feb 5, 2009.

  1. spider-man

    spider-man Well-Known Member

    It might be because living in the US, your cousin is trying to blend into the US culture
    and because at home, your cousin living in his/ her viet culture.
  2. homoloto

    homoloto Well-Known Member


    so true.
    some change back, some not, u cant say rite or wrong.
  3. Hartia

    Hartia Well-Known Member

    its like your PA status says....."Banana"

    nah but yeh they are mostly white-washed. otherwise they have the viet vibe to try to act badass. it's jsut that personality we have. we'll i'm half so i'm not as gang -related as other full viets i know in TO
  4. Kduong722

    Kduong722 Active Member

    Pretty good mix in the Bay Area about who they hang out with
  5. Psy

    Psy New Member

    lol. . . I once tried to teach the white kids at my school big 2. They weren't that interested.
    Also, I hope you don't mind that I've stolen your Nana GIF.
  6. sharonlee

    sharonlee New Member

    vietnamese girls in Toronto like myself tend to be more westernized. Also I prefer both white and asian guys...depends on the guy
  7. surplusletterbox

    surplusletterbox Well-Known Member

    I think the reason is due to mother nature or mother tongue (that's why there is no expression called father nature). Likewise it is mostly the women who get the children (even of mixed race) to viet Saturday or Sunday language schools. In a mixed marriage so it is much higher chance a Viet mum takes a child to learn Viet lang than a Viet dad. Another reason is self discrimination or different expectation, my experience is that an Asian future parents in law are more likely to be negative or critical about their own kind than a white guy. So if a less than good looking viet girl goes to white boyfriend's parents they just say welcome in general but if the same less good looking Viet girl goes to a Viet boyfriend's parents, they dish out unkind expression of her looks! Likewise for negativity for income, type of car, parents' background/.... altogether very complicated so much simpler with a white guy. Now for a much simpler white girl, easy come and easy go, liberated with absolute freedom, a Viet boy may not cope well.
  8. I am confused by your argument. Regarding the first part of your argument, how is the allusion of the female role of motherhood in the expression "Mother nature" and "mother tongue" relate to your second argument of Vietnamese future parent-in-laws being overcritical of their child's significant other?

    So assuming your argument is in fact two separate argument:

    1) Re: allusion of the female role of motherhood in the expression "Mother nature" and "mother tongue"

    I guess I sort of get where this argument comes from. In the past, "goddesses were worshipped for their association with fertility, fecundity, and agricultural bounty" (Wiki), which some may make the allusion that women are also more concerned about their offspring's education. But in reality, what parent, regardless of gender, isn't concerned with their child's education? And there is no empirical evidence that women drive their kids to Viet school more than men. I used to work at a Vietnamese school, and most parents who drive their kids to school are fathers.

    But I digress, I am in fact more curious about how this thought fits into the main topic. :)

    2) Re: Vietnamese future parent-in-laws being overcritical of their child's significant other

    This may perhaps be accurate. It is indeed possible that someone might be more inclined to date outside of the race, due not wanting to experience their parents being overly critical. However if this was indeed the case, they should have realized that dating outside the race would still make parents overcritical regarding who they date.

    I don't doubt for a fact that many (and I mean MANY) Vietnamese are major gossipers. They talk shit about everyone and anyone behind their backs. However I don't think this is restricted to the Vietnamese culture. Take a look at the Korean culture and, hell, the French. The French have been known to be MAJOR shit talkers. IMO, regardless of race, shit talkers are driven by one of many factors, pride, money, appearance, status etc. It can basically be summed up as: ego and/or greed.

    With that aside, I doubt whether or not these girls really do date/hang outside the race because of the previous point. Many don't care about the opinions of their parents, so why would they care about choosing to date/hang with an ethnicity to avoid hearing about their parents' criticism?

    But going back to OP's question as to why some Viet kids ("Việt Kiều") hang out with non-Viets. It honestly has nothing to do with race. It has to do with the culture they feel they associate with the most. I am a Việt Kiều, and I hang around with non-Viets much more than Viets (although I am now making more efforts to hang out with Viets because I want to reconnect with my ethnicity). The reason why I hang out with non-Viets more is because I am Canadian. I associate with the Canadian culture more than I do the Vietnamese culture. I don't (or rather didn't) find any commonality between myself and other Vietnamese, other than our shared ethnicity. It is about the culture that you feel you have most in common with and associate with.
  9. ralphrepo

    ralphrepo Well-Known Member

    You know, every time I read threads like this, I get that Yogi Berra moment of "It's like déjà vu all over again." From my perspective a lot of ethnicity, love, culture and race while seemingly insular and sublime, is actually rather universal; contemporary movies have long recognized this; Moscow On The Hudson, Please Teach Me English, and Bend It Like Beckham, just to name a few.

    Despite our alien or foreign cultures, we all need and want (to various degrees), a sense of belonging in our environment. How much is the correct amount really depends on each of us as individuals and what we decide is comfortable for each of us. That is, there is no correct nor incorrect amount. Thus, I find terms such as 'whitewash' to be regrettable and socially awkward. People decide on their level of integration and they shouldn't be faulted or stigmatized for it; even US Justice, Clarence Thomas, stated as much after he was called out to be an 'Uncle Tom' because of his repeatedly conservative, and often perceptually anti-black, court voting record.

    And the statement "...Now for a much simpler white girl, easy come and easy go, liberated with absolute freedom, a Viet boy may not cope well," is just an over generalization that doesn't do justice to the issue. I'm not Viet, but I'm 100% Asian, so there's some similarities; I've lived with and have been married to white women. I can tell you from personal experience, that race probably has less to do with attitudes than many other things, especially when discussing liberation or freedom. It remains a very individualized metric, dependent on the person more so than the culture or race, with the exception perhaps of cultural or religiously intolerant precepts.
    #29 ralphrepo, Nov 22, 2013
    Last edited: Nov 22, 2013
  10. ralphrepo

    ralphrepo Well-Known Member

    The most ironic line in that article was: