I've got a question when is is right to call a person " chu"/"co" (miss/mister) instead of "anh"/"chi" i am asking this because some people i know (around 45), i have to address them as chi and anh. there's huge gap between my age and them, in my opinion i have to address them as co and chu. what do you think? what i should do ?
how to address a person in Vietnamese is a very complex and difficult subject. it depends on Age, levels of respect and circumstances. if you want learn, the best way is to mingle with the crowd. in general calling someone about your age are "anh" or " chi" is good enough without offend them.
im guessing anh/chi is for brother and sister? -shrug.... this goes for most asian cultures as well, anyone that is older than you by at least 18 years you should call uncle/aunt or Mister/Miss and those under that age gap should be called brother/sisters...
i have the same problem, i am 21, they are 50.. i call them anh/chi because they are somehow related 5 generations... long story, but it's my great great grandparents i think... a general rule for me to choose when to call bac/chu/co/anh/chi is as follows: if it's an adult whom i don't know the relationship to myself, and older than my parents, i call them bac. if it's an adult whom i don't know the relationship to myself, and younger than my parents, i call them chu/co if it's an adult whom i don't know the relationship to myself, and don't know their age, i call them bac. if it's someone whom i don't know the relationship to myself, and who is older than me by a couple of years, i call them anh/chi. i usually call older people by bac, even though most people in toronto and US call them co/chu. i find bac is more respectful and polite than co/chu. i don't know why people call them co/chu.
still it feels kinda weird to say to person who's 30 years older to me anh/chi but im gettign used to it. but the most weird thing is that their kids (around the same age as me) have to call me "chu"!
dude don't worry, i am in the same situation. my niece, who i consider equal to me, like friends level, she calls me chu i call her parents and chi it takes some getting used to
As a native speaker, here's my take: how you address a person related and non-related is very different so DON'T mesh them together. it's the same with Korean and Chinese for family related members, it's not about "AGE" but the "standing" on the family tree sorta speak so the address should be very CLEAR. I don't suspect any problem with that and if there is/are, you should confirm it with your parents. People will laugh at you if you don't know how to address your relative correctly (of course, in Vietnam only) especially if you're an educated person. now on to addressing non-related people - waiter or whatever. anh and chi for those under 50 y/o (in Vietnam though, in upper class restaurant, it's formal to call Chu and Co whilst Anh and Chi is more for the local eateries in a way to establish a more "closeness" feeling where as Co and Chu is more distant) Here in the US, there's no such distinction so it really doesn't matter. They serve you whatever regardless of what you call them but i think the ladies prefer to call chi, em, or co gai dep more .. everyone loves to appear "young", right? hope that helps.
i'm surprised so many people call non-relatives chu/co....... i was raised to call them bac, for maximum respect. why do i think that way? for example, if a friend of mine, younger than me meets my parents, they call them co/chu, and i call theirs as bac. by calling my parents co/chu, they consider their parents higher standing than my parents. when i call their parents by bac, it makes it seem like their parents are higher standing than mine, purely for respect and politeness. this doesn't apply to waiters or whatever, only people like family friends, friend's family, etc
sorry buddy but you're wrong with the "bac" .. that only applies to people over 50 y/o related or not .. generally speaking .. it's "bac trai or bac gai" .. nothing to do with standing or respect .. just a gesture calling .. over in the US .. some even call other "cau" in general for everyone .. gal/guy .. people say everything cuz they're not properly educated in Vietnamese and i gotta say, these people who speak "broken" Vietnamese are the ones mixed with Chinese (no offense intended here) .. that's why kids get them wrong too. Even though Chinese live in Vietnam, they didn't go to school due to discrimination back then and financial situtation. After the Vietnam war, a lot people fled the country; again, predominately Chinese to places like Australia, Hong Kong, Taiwan, Indonesia, Thailand, Holland, France, Britain, and of course, the US; thus, the Chinese never really educated in Vietnam. Speaking the language and being able to communicate with others doesn't mean s/he can't speak and write properly. Anyway, the point is, the language has morphed over time into less formal like the Canto that got all these slangs and addresses...
lol you can go ahead and blame 3 vietnamese schools that i went to. i'm not saying you're wrong, in fact, you may be correct for all i know. i may be wrong, but unless my teachers are wrong, my parents who were raised in vietnam are wrong, my grandparents who all hold a degree in vietnamese law, education, and journalism to be wrong, i'm gonna have to assume that the "bac trai" and "bac gai" addresses are correct.
sorry, i should take back what i said. i forgot that different "region" in Vietnam do address people differently. the north sounds more formal and educated than the south part of the country (less formal); where as the middle (Da Nang and Hue); less educated and even more informal. i am speaking from the South; though I was educated in the North. you kinda blend in after living in the South for a long time. nevertheless, in general term, what i said above still apply for "bac".
